I can not believe it’s actually here already! Tomorrow is the day! How am I feeling, you ask? I’ll be honest… I’m all over the place!
I feel happy that it’s finally here. It’s been a long ride. Almost two years on a waiting list, 6 months in a Pre-op program, and then a 6 week wait for a date. Yep, Long time coming!
I’m ready. Ready for a new life of health and shrinkage. I’m ready for this chapter to be done and a new one to start.
I’m nervous. I am pretty sure it will all go smooth and just as planned. I mean, how many of these procedures have been done with great success? But, like they say, there are always risks with any surgery, and I’m trying not to focus on those possibilities, but they creep in now and then and my heart starts to race and I feel like icant breath. I’m in good hands with the Dr’s and their staff, but more importantly, I’m in God’s hands and he’s totally got this under control.
I’m emotional. This morning I went from being awake and happy to grumpy (sorry family) to crying… In about 30 seconds. I feel like my head is all over the place and all I want to do is curl up on the couch and sleep, cry, EAT! What ever… But I can’t do that. Because..
I feel panicked… I’m behind on getting stuff done. Cleaning the house, laundry, packing, making sure Brian is good to be with the kids for 4 days (my parents will be here to help so I know he will be just fine), making sure my kids know I love them and I’ll miss them (crying again)… The list seems to go on….and now…
I’m exhausted. I have almost no energy to get that stuff done. I just want to hang out with my family and laugh and relax or sleep.
So yep, I’m all over the place. At the end of the day, I’ll be heading to the hospital no matter what. Come 6 am I’m out the door and I’ll be back Thursday evening. Everything else will either get done or it won’t. I have to not worry about it all. Start at the top and work my way down and out the door. 🙂
I found this picture of myself from the end of high school… I don’t imagine I’ll get this small again, but I’m looking forward to feeling like the girl in this picture looks… Happy, healthy and active… 🙂
Have a great week and I’ll be back with an update when I can!! Thabks for all the encouragement and thoughts and prayers!! I appreciate them all!