Well….as I thought, it wasn’t that hard to get that one pound knocked off. “Well of course not! It’s just one pound” you say…well, for me its the first step in a HUGE success plan I have going on! I will never see 273 again!
I have discovered something about myself. I think I have known this for a long time but it was really obvious to me this past week. Some of you know that I used to drink like a fish! Yep, I am a recovered alcoholic. I never drank to forget a hard life, to escape a bad day, to be self-destructive. I drank because I loved the feeling of being drunk. That’s it. The sooner I got that way and the longer I could stay that way the better the night was. I was a happy, loud, funny drunk… the life of the party (sometimes). I feel the same way when I eat. I love the feeling of being FULL! The satisfaction of eating something I really love is like being drunk for me. I realized that on Saturday night when I caved and ordered out for some Chinese food. I LOVE ginger beef! So I stuffed my face with ginger beef and noodles, a Pepsi, and then ate some chips that were in the kitchen. It felt so good to be full and to have enjoyed every bite! Then it hit me…everything I had done since last Tuesday to try and lose that one pound may have been for nothing after this one meal! I was instantly angry with myself…so what did I do…yep, had some ice cream! Why not, the damage had been done already. UGG!
SO on Sunday I started again. I forgot about Saturday, wrote it off as a bad day and drank water, slept when I could (really tired from Relay for Life). I spent time thinking about my “Need” to eat and be full. Then it hit me….I have traded my Crown and Coke for cheese burgers and Pepsi! I haven’t really recovered…I’ve just replaced the booze with food. Which is why I’m so glad I am working through a great devo called Made to Crave!
I have 2 choices here. I can either continue to struggle with this need to be full and break down and start over all week OR I can change that need to be filled by food into a need to be filled with GOD! I do have a back door to this problem. I can pray for strength, read my bible, talk to God like he’s right there and seek his advice. I will always struggle with food. I’d rather that than alcohol. But I don’t have to let it win. God can be my portion, my bread, my strength.
I’m not really sure where I was going with this post now. hehehe…all this to say I have lost my pound. (I have lost more but I’m not going to tell you how much!) I will focus on one more this week (from Tuesday to Tuesday) and see where I end up. At the end of the month I will share an update on my new goal weight. You can do the math to figure out what I have lost. 🙂 Have a great week!
If you would like to take the journey and learn to Crave God…here is the link to the site. They will email you a reading every day for 21 days…they are very encouraging!